the only living thing

i woke up this morning & bought this flower for my friend : i brought it back to the house before i was able to give it to my friend & as it sat on the window sill, it made itself very beautiful : more beautiful than when i bought it : i've done nothing but look at it for a good hour now : i'm peeking at it this very moment, just to make sure it is o.k., has a nice spot of sun, & is alive : it will be very happy with my friend, too : i know that : otherwise i probably wouldn't give it away : it just feels good to have something alive here : my house moves different with the flower here : everything is shaped around it : this is the first time in a month that i've been able to think of one thing, outside of myself, for an extended period of time : i woke up with a strange note in my pants pocket : it is a note i wrote to myself : i'm going to throw it away without ever thinking of it again : & i'll never write another note to myself for as long as i live : from now on, i wish only to write notes to others : Sartre was wrong, & probably spent too much time with himself : im not at all certain what loneliness is, but thinking of others feels like wind

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